Sunday, 8 April 2012

Innocent things.

So here I am, back at home for the holidays and already missing university more than I probably should.
Maybe it's because I'm back to sleeping in the bedroom where my more innocent years were spent, but over the past few days I've found myself in a much more... Innocent mood. I've started thinking about things differently, or things that I haven't thought about in a very long time. For example, kisses. Those sweet, innocent little iotas of affection that were so desperately sought after a few years ago, but nowadays seem to mean very little.

I remember being fourteen, and discussing boys at school with my friends during lunchtime. Back then, the biggest thing that could happen to you was being kissed. A year later we started playing Spin The Bottle at house parties, and you'd think this would cheapen and demean the whole concept of kissing, but somehow the beauty and perfection of a kiss remained intact... At least for one more year.

Sixteen was the year when all hell broke loose. Kissing wasn't enough any more. Suddenly we were tossing each other off in tents, undoing bras and being slammed against walls. By seventeen, most of us were having sex. By eighteen, all of us were having sex. And suddenly, kissing wasn't so important any more.

Nowadays, if someone asks you about your night, you would respond by saying something like: "I slept with
____". You wouldn't think to mention that person you kissed earlier on that night, because that wouldn't be worth mentioning. A few years ago, is you were asked the same question, you'd say "ohmygosh ____ kissed me!" Like it was the most exciting thing to happen, ever. Of course, every now and again you'll hear people say "yeah, I got with ___ many people", but even that isn't the same. "Got with", as I've tried to explain unsuccessfully to my parents several times, can mean anything from a series of kisses to a passionate groping session on the dancefloor. There's no expression for just one kiss. In fact, I told my friend just the other day that a certain someone (who shall, of course, remain completely anonymous) kissed me, and she responded with: "what? He kissed you? Like, just the one kiss? That's new..."

Kisses still mean something to me. I used to kiss a friend goodnight after walking him partway home, and for me, that was exciting. It felt much more meaningful than a make out session; it left something to the imagination, and made me want more without overdoing it.

I'm not saying I'm unhappy with what constitutes good gossip and excitement nowadays (c'mon, sex is pretty awesome), but sometimes I do get a little sad that we've lost the value of a kiss. 

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