Tuesday, 1 November 2011

Option: Time.

The way I see it, when you go through a break-up, regardless of whether it is amicable or vicious, you then have three options when it comes to dealing with it and moving on. You can: a) rush straight into another full-on relationship (better known as a "rebound", which sometimes can be taken too seriously and too far), or b) sleep around and get into all kinds of trouble (to prove some kind of point to yourself while also making the most of being "free"), or finally c) give it time, let yourself grieve, wait for someone better and in the meantime find out who you really are.

I hate the expression people spoonfeed you when you're going through a rough patch in your life: "give it time." It seems like the most useless piece of advice one could ever give or receive. I always thought: "Well, how is that supposed to help?" But over the past few months, I've realised that there is some truth in this hideous cliche. I went through my very first break-up, and chose Option C. My ex chose Option A. Well, each to their own.

It took me six months to completely move on and even then I was genuinely surprised to find myself developing feelings for someone else. I hadn't expected to feel "okay" after such a short amount of time. I don't know how some people can move on so quickly. I was crying and wallowing for every moment of those six months, wondering when it would end and if I'd ever be truly happy with anyone else. My dear old Dad said to me: "it's good that you feel this way. Because it shows that he meant something to you." Then when I eventually brought a boy home for the first time since the break-up, my parents were absolutely thrilled.

What heals a broken heart... Chocolate? Romantic comedies? Sellotape? Alcohol?
All of the above? Actually, the only thing you really need is time. Well, time, and the latest Adele album. x

PS: I'm not religious, but please #prayforAdele.

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